The helpful advice of others, or what they presume to be helpful advice…don’t we just love it? It’s always interesting to have people who have absolutely no clue as to what we go through everyday try and tell us WHY we we are sick, WHAT caused us to be sick, and the REASON we are sick is because we have NEGATIVE thoughts.
How many studies, news articles, blog posts, reports, etc. have to be done on ME/CFS, Fibromyalgia and other invisible illnesses before people get it that WE ARE SICK – PHYSICALLY SICK. WE ARE NOT MENTAL CASES!
I had a smack down from my hubby this week because he heard John Tesh say on his radio show that people with chronic illnesses are sick and don’t recover because they are generally negative people and don’t think positive thoughts about themselves or life in general. I was furious.
I do believe that having a positive attitude can affect one’s health, but it is not the end all, be all determinant of such. It’s when people get on their soapboxes, like John Tesh, and then my husband with me, and basically saying that we are MAKING ourselves sick, I just want to throw something.
I tried to explain to my husband that the negativity vs. being sick is kind of like the same theory as the depression theory we always heard with our illnesses. People with chronic illnesses are always told that they are sick because they are depressed first. But we have explained to our doctors and anyone who will listen that the sickness came first, then the depression. It is the same with the negativity. When I am feeling well, I don’t have the negative thoughts. I am like a completely different woman. It’s when the long flares kick in, the overwhelming pain sets in, that the negativity starts to breed. And I work on that – every single day.
But you can’t expect someone to be running through the fields like Julie Andrews singing and twirling when in the misery we are in. Sorry – but it’s just not going to happen. If it brings you down, then you shouldn’t have signed up for it is all I can say. The only thing I can do is try my best every single day to be a better person and I am constantly trying to work on myself.
Chronic illness is just that. It is CHRONIC. It is not going away and negative thoughts, positive thoughts, whatever we do is not going to make it go away. Period.