I apologize I haven’t posted for a couple of days. I have had insomnia since Saturday night and I have been extremely exhausted. We had a busy weekend with my husband’s business, then I had to work on Monday & Tuesday. I have also been going through another Interstitial Cystitis flare and I had to purchase marshmallow root for the first time in a couple of years to help ease the pain and symptoms.
Sunday I spent all day at the toy show running to the bathroom and having abdominal pain and pelvic pressure. Then Sunday night I was up all night because my son got sick and was throwing up. I only had a little better than an hour of sleep that night then I had to go into work first thing Monday morning. I figured by now I would be sleeping pretty well at night but last night I was awake until after 4 a.m., then I had to get up at 7:00 a.m. to get my son ready for school. I tried sleeping once he left for school but my husband kept calling me on the cell phone and blowing his loud truck horn everytime he passed the house. I get so frustrated and I feel like I am on the verge of a mental breakdown when I go this long without sleep. I have told him over and over again if I do not answer the phone then I am either sleeping or trying to sleep. I might as well talk to myself, though, because he doesn’t quit calling.
It never seems to matter how many times I tell people I need sleep I’m still not left alone. Today I just wanted to run away from home and go check into a hotel for a few days so that I can get some peace and quiet. I love my husband and my son but they are both so needy sometimes and they act as though they can’t survive without me around for even a few hours. I just don’t have the energy to keep up and I need a break from everything. My husband is very supportive most of the time and he does try to take our son off of my hands whenever I am not doing well, but I’m still not left alone long enough to get any rest that will do me any good. For example, today after my son came home from school I was trying to sleep and even though he was downstairs with my husband, he kept coming upstairs to ask me if he could have something to eat or something to drink. Why didn’t he just ask his dad? He was downstairs with him. I know these things sound trivial but when you haven’t had hardly any sleep for several nights every little thing seems exaggerated.
Today after the repeated calls and the repeated horn blows waking me up, I gave up and worked on getting the house cleaned. I have to work tomorrow and my goal was to get that job done today. After I was done I was really miserable, however. I just want to sleep like a normal person even if it is only for one night. That would be better than what I’ve been getting.