Today I went back to work after being off for two weeks and as I was making my way around the store, I kept thinking about how strong of a person one must be to live and cope with CFS & Fibromyalgia. The old saying that “God doesn’t give you more than you can handle” must be true. If not, look how many millions of us wouldn’t be here anymore?
I feel that I have always been a very strong and independent person and while sometimes that has been to my detriment, it has helped me in dealing with these illnesses. I think that because a lot of us have Type A personalities with CFS & FM, we have carried through with our determination in getting through the miserable times of sickness like we used to get through working lots of overtime and everything else we did to succeed.
I do get down and depressed at times, especially when I am experiencing a flare like I just went through the past two weeks. But I feel that for the most part, I, as well as many others, have learned to put CFS & Fibromyalgia in a compartment in our lives and we have learned to do what we can, when we can, and take things one day at a time. It is hard for most people to not know what their lives will be like one day from the next – and that is what we live with. From the time our heads raise off the pillow in the morning (if they do! :), we have to live our day minute to minute, hour to hour. Plans are never set – they are always a “maybe”. We can’t depend on a set income because we don’t know how long we will be able to work, if at all, and how many hours we will be able to do on a weekly basis. Because of this, we have had to learn how to be creative and very good at math – LOL.
It takes strength to live in a normal world when we are anything but normal. Everything we come in contact with in life revolves around normal thinking, working, shopping, whatever it may be. The world is not designed to accomodate sick people like us. Yes, we can get handicap placards for our cars and ride the electric carts at the stores, but that’s about it for us.
Employers don’t know what to do with us, our families don’t know what to do with us, and if we have any friends left, they don’t either. We know that everytime we make a friend it probably won’t be for the long-term because they don’t know how to cope with our frequent relapses and constant cancellations. So we often end up lonely, hanging on because of the strength and determination God gave us to somehow, someway get through life. We are squares trying to fit in a round world – and it takes a lot of guts and strength to be different. Even more so when we have illnesses that have had sugh huge stigmas surrounding them like CFS & Fibromyalgia.
Be proud of who you are, flaws, sickness and all. You are strong because you are still here -f ighting every day.